


Fighting Just to Make Up

by LizardOnIce27



Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-08
Updated: 2014-01-22
Packaged: 2018-01-08 00:10:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1126032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LizardOnIce27/pseuds/LizardOnIce27
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pete and Patrick argue all the time, but one day it leads to something Patrick never expected to happen. Sure he'd imagined it, but he didn't think it'd ever actually happen. He also never thought he'd try to put a stop to it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The first time it happened, neither of us expected it. I’d say it was an accident, but it progressed a bit for to use that excuse. Pete and I were arguing, yelling and screaming at each other over song lyrics. It wasn’t the first time we’d had an argument about lyrics that turned into a screaming match, or the last. But this time wasn’t like the others. Eventually we’d scream ourselves out, march off in different directions and talk about it later. In the end, Pete usually won. Not that time. Somewhere during our yelling, Pete provoked me just the right amount, and I shoved him. Shoving is also a normal occurrence with us. He shoved back and then I shoved him against the wall and held him there. I didn’t release my grip as we each caught our breath. I knew I needed to let go, I needed to walk away to blow off steam, but when his eyes caught mine I couldn’t move. This is usually the part in the fight where Andy and Joe decide we’ve been at this for too long and forces one of us out of the room. The only problem was, Pete and I were sharing a hotel room, and Joe and Andy were out seeing some movie. We stood completely still for a few seconds before I shoved him harder into the wall, and did something I’d been dying to do since I was underage. I pressed my lips hard against his and in less than a second I came to my senses, so I quickly pulled away. While I tried to stammer out an apology, he started walking me backwards to the bed. It’s pretty obvious from here where that went. The next day, Pete and I did probably the worst thing possible. We ignored it completely, aside from the fact that I won the argument.

 

I thought it was a one time thing, no big deal. We both needed to relieve some stress, just a one time thing. But since then every single argument has led to the same outcome. We’ve even been picking fights while we’re alone, just to get off. Don’t get me wrong, the sex is great. But I know we should stop. It’s complicating things. One of them being, I want more than just a physical relationship with Pete. Andy has noticed what we’ve been doing after a loud fight on the bus. We were in the back room, but it’s not easy to be quiet when you’re yelling, or moaning for that matter. Joe is oblivious to it, still to this day. And I guess I thought the hiatus would help Pete and I, give us a little space away from each other, let us both clear our heads. All hopes of that were shattered when, after a show, I checked my voicemail on my bus. I should have deleted it as soon as I noticed his heavy breathing.

“Hey ‘Trick, how’s tour going?” there was some background noise I couldn’t quite make out, before I heard his heavy breathing, his voice deepened just a bit, “You might want to make sure you’re alone.”

That’s when I should have deleted the voicemail. I knew what was going to happen, I knew what he was doing. But he couldn’t prove I listened, I could claim I deleted it. So I listened to Pete’s heavy breathing, biting my lip at the first moan. Unable to help myself as I unbuttoned my pants and did exactly what Pete wanted me to.

 

Now that we’re touring again though, so far I’ve managed to ignore Pete baiting me for a fight. It’s been difficult, because he knows exactly which buttons to press to piss me off, and he’s all too aware of how short my fuse is. I tried pretending I had a boyfriend, to see if that’d make him stop but he didn’t believe me. The fact that he found it so unlikely that I had a boyfriend just pissed me off more.

 

I walk into a vacant public restroom while we’re stopped at a rest stop for the night and pull at my hair. He’s not making this easy, and he’s _enjoying_ it. He knows I won’t be able to resist fighting back for long and with all the anger I’ve been holding inside I’m surprised I haven’t gone off and just beaten him to a pulp. I kick a stall door angrily. I’m only fighting because I can’t take this anymore. I don’t want to be Pete’s stress relief. I don’t want the only sex we ever have to be angry, and rough. I like rough, but I want it to actually mean something to him. And it never will so I have to stop doing this to myself.

“You alright?” Andy opens the door and peers in.

“No, No I’m not. Andy can we please tie him up and duct tape his fucking mouth shut? Because I can’t take it!”

“I’m about to go for a run… you should come with me. It’ll help relieve some of that anger.” he gently squeezes my shoulder, “I get that he’s driving you crazy. Hell, he’s even starting to piss Joe and I off because he won’t stop trying to pick a fight…”

I bite my lip, “I’m not really much of a runner.”

“Then we can walk.” he tugs me out of the restroom but my arm, “C’mon. Best to escape while Pete is occupied.”

I nod and walk with him down the street, away from the bus. We’re silent for a few blocks before Andy glances over at me.

“I’m proud of you, by the way.”

I raise an eyebrow, “Proud of me?”

He shrugs, “Pete’s been pushing all the right buttons to make you flip out and so far you’ve handled it pretty well...except bottling it isn’t really good for you either.”

“Well it’s better than fighting back because then we’ll..” I blush and look down at my feet, before groaning, “How does that even happen? I’m tempted to kill him and then…”

“Well, sex is um…” he blushes as well, “It’s a good outlet. But with you and Pete….not so much.” he shrugs, “I mean, it’d be different if you were both just in it for the sex but when your emotions are there too, it makes it worse. You just need a different outlet.”

“Is that why we’re walking?” I ask.

“Mhm.” he nods, “Physical activity reduces stress, and so does talking about it. So, if you’d like to talk while we’re away from Pete, I’ll have no problem listening.”

I bite my lip, “I don’t need to, I mean you already know the gist of it.”

He shakes his head, “No, Patrick, you aren’t talking for my benefit. You’re talking for your own. Anything you need to say, even if it’s not related, just say it.”

I look down as we walk, “I just, don’t get me wrong I mean, I like it, it’s…” I blush, “It’s good. But even though it only happens when we’re fighting, it still means more to me than it does to him...and if I let it continue it always will.”

He nods, “And you’ve been fighting it.”

I nod, “But it’s hard. He just, some things he’s said didn’t just make me angry but they hurt too.” I frown, “Like when I said I had a boyfriend and he didn’t believe me. Is it so impossible for someone to want an actual relationship with me, just because he doesn’t?”

“Of course not, Patrick. But you’re not really the best liar, and on top of that he knows you really well.” Andy shrugs.

“Think he’d back off if actually had one?” I look over to him.

Andy nods, “Pete’s selfish, but he’s firmly against cheating. He wouldn’t do that.”

I sigh, “Too bad I’ve spent my time too obsessed with Pete to find a boyfriend.”

Andy gives me a sympathetic smile, “I understand that… Well, not Pete.”

I nod, “Joe.”

He blushes, “Wh-What? I don’t even-”

“Save it.” I roll my eyes, “Joe might not have noticed, and Pete’d be obnoxious if he ever did, but I’ve known for a while.”

He bites his lip, “Well damn.”

“Obnoxious…” I look over to Andy, “Fuck. Pete’s being really obnoxious. Does that mean he knows that I…”

Andy shakes his head, “No, I think he’s just being obnoxious because you’re not fighting back. We should probably back here.”

I nod as we turn around and walk back the way we came.

“Eventually he’s going to ask why you’re not fighting back.”

I sigh, “I know.”

“Are you going to tell him?”

I shake my head, “I’d rather die. I know he doesn’t feel anything towards me.”

“Then why not let go?” Andy frowns.

“I’m trying...but it’s hard when sex gets involved.” I shrug, “And if he keeps picking fights it’s sure to happen soon.”

“No.” Andy shakes his head, “No, because you’re going to say you have a boyfriend-”

“Andy that didn’t work the last time.”

“Well last time you didn’t have someone to backup your story. A boyfriend for Pete to actually see, so he couldn’t disprove it.”

“Yeah...and I still don’t.” I raise an eyebrow.

“Well not a real one, no but…” he bites his lip, “I have an idea. It’s not the greatest but you don’t have many options.”

“Okay, what’s the idea?” I stop walking and turn to face him.

He glances at me nervously before taking my hand and lacing our fingers, “We could, we could lie to Pete. Pretend we’re together. And so he doesn’t get suspicious, we don’t just come out and say it. We let him catch us holding hands or..” he blushes, “kissing, something like that. If um, if you’d be okay with that.”

I blush, “So we just pretend we’re together?”

He nods, “How hard can it be? Pete will back off.”

“Yes, but what? Are we going to fake-date forever? Because I think if we just break up he’ll go right back to it.” 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.” Andy shrugs, “Maybe you’ll meet a guy who takes your mind off Pete.”

I shake my head, “I don’t know Andy…”

“It can’t hurt to try, it’ll at least buy you a little time away from Pete driving you crazy.” he shrugs.

I sigh and start walking again, our hands still linked, “If you’re sure.”

 

Andy opens the curtain to my bunk and whispers, “Pete’s brushing his teeth, this would be a good time for him to catch us.”

I blush, “O-Oh. O-Okay.”

He smiles, “Don’t be so nervous.” we hear the door unlock, “Come here!” Andy whispers before pulling me closer and into a kiss. It starts out as a few quick pecks, but the last peck deepens into more. His soft lips move with mine at a slow pace. He pulls me closer and licks my lip.

“Holy shit.” Pete’s voice makes us jump apart, just as my tongue was getting acquainted with Andy’s.

“O-Oh. Um.” Andy clears his throat, “N-Night Patrick.” he ducks into his bunk under mine.

Pete raises an eyebrow, “What was that?”

“I-I think y-you’re old enough to know what kissing is.” I quickly shut the curtain and peek down at Andy through the open space between my mattress and the wall.

He gives me a thumbs up before turning off his light and moving out of my vision.

“Night.” I mumble before turning on my side and closing my eyes, trying to ignore the taste of Andy’s tongue still in my mouth.


	2. Cold Showers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Joe.” Pete says quietly from the far side of the bus, “Have you noticed anything...odd about Andy and Patrick?”
> 
> “Not really?” Joe answers, “I mean, they’ve been hanging out a lot. But they probably just missed hanging out.”
> 
> “Yeah… Yeah, you’re probably right.” Pete mumbles.

Pete hasn’t said anything about catching Andy and I kissing all day. He has stopped trying to piss me off, so there’s a plus. Andy and I don’t say anything to him about it either, we just stand close and hold hands ever so often. Tonight is a hotel night, and instead of Pete and I sharing like we usually do, I’m staying with Andy. Right now Andy and I aren’t trying to fake a relationship, because we’re talking to fans and signing whatever they shove in our direction, after a show. We both agreed it’d be believable that we just didn’t want our business public. So we sign shirts, concert tickets, hats, I even signed a shoe earlier, and talk to the fans. We thank them for coming to see us, hug them and let them take pictures with us, until the long line of people disappear and we trudge onto the bus, exhausted. I kick off my shoes and climb into my bunk, only to be followed by Andy.

“Hi there…” I raise an eyebrow.

He grins and whispers, “Shh, listen.”

“Joe.” Pete says quietly from the far side of the bus, “Have you noticed anything...odd about Andy and Patrick?”

“Not really?” Joe answers, “I mean, they’ve been hanging out a lot. But they probably just missed hanging out.”

“Yeah… Yeah, you’re probably right.” Pete mumbles.

His footsteps get closer as Andy reaches up and messes up my hair.

“What are you doing?” I whisper.

“Making it look like we’ve been making out, now shh.” he whispers back before kissing my neck.

My eyes widen, and I let out a tiny squeak when he starts sucking, biting and licking a certain spot on my neck, “Mmm, A-Andy.” I push him back a bit and mouth, “What are you doing?”

He leans down and nips my earlobe, whispering, “I’d have thought giving you a hickey was obvious.” he lets out a soft laugh, his warm breath gently touching my neck.

I blush, “O-Okay well that’s taken care of then.”

He whispers, “Just relax. We won’t be very convincing if we both seem nervous every time we kiss.”

I blush and nod before he leans down and presses his slightly wet lips against mine. His hands find their way into my hair as mine snake around his waist. He licks at my lips, and I part them eagerly, licking at his tongue. He grips my hair tightly, licking the roof of my mouth slowly enough to make me squirm and tug him closer to avoid knocking him off the bunk. He chuckles into the kiss and pushes me to lie on my back, not breaking the kiss as he straddles my waist and lies on top of me. I lick into his mouth, determined to taste every bit of it. I slide my tongue across his and lick at the roof of his mouth, letting out a low moan deep in my throat, as he presses his hips down against mine.

The curtain is jerked open, “Guys! Can you two not wait until we get to the hotel? It’ll be five minutes!” Pete snaps.

Andy blushes and rolls to lay beside me, panting softly, “Y-Yeah, sorry.”

“When the hell did this start?” Pete shakes his head, “And what, Joe and I didn’t deserve to know?”

“I-”

“About a month ago.” Andy cuts me off and shrugs, “And it’s not that we just kinda wanted it to between the two of us for a while.”

“And the loud making out, that was supposed to help keep it a secret?” He rolls his eyes.

“No um…” I blush, “I’m usually a little better at being quiet.”

He snorts, “Yeah, okay. Just, please keep your hands to yourselves until you’re in your hotel room.”

 

Andy closes the door behind him and lets out a small sigh, “Finally away from Pete’s glaring.”

“Glaring?” I raise an eyebrow and set my bag of clothes, and laptop case on one of the beds.

He nods, “You didn’t notice the “Die painfully and go to hell” look he was giving me?”

I shake my head, “No..”

“I guess he’s not too pleased about you being sexually unavailable.” Andy shrugs, “Oh well. That’s the point, right?”

“Yeah...mind if I shower first? I swear I’ll hurry.”

He nods, “That’s fine. I’ve been dying to finish reading my book all day, I’m about to start the last chapter.” he grins before opening his bag and pulling out a worn, paperback book.

“Alright, see ya.” I grab my bag of clothes and go into the bathroom, closing the door behind me and setting the bag on the sink. I undress, noticing the bruise Andy left on my neck and blushing. Honestly I think a few quick pecks on my lips would have sufficed. I bite my lip and grab my phone, pulling up my music before turning on the water and getting in, listening to the music and trying not to think about the way Andy made me squirm. Or think about his soft lips against my neck. Or the taste of his mouth. I groan and turn the knob as far to the cold side as I can and quickly shower and get out, shivering as I towel myself dry. I pull on my boxers and pajama pants, quickly pulling on a T-shirt before shoving my dirty clothes into the bag. I grab my toothbrush and toothpaste out of the bag and quickly brush my teeth, hearing Pete’s voice through the door.

“Can I just please room with you two? I know you wanted to be alone and whatever, but when I got out of the shower Joe had some girl in there and I really don’t want to be there when their clothes disappear.” 

“There’s only two beds.” Andy sighs.

“What? You and your _boyfriend_ can’t share a bed? His bunk seemed to work for you earlier.” Pete snorts.

I bite my lip and open the door, pushing my glasses up on my nose, “So I guess you’re sleeping here?”

“Unless you and you’re boyfriend don’t want to share a bed. I mean, hell what’s the point if you sleep in separate beds?”

I roll my eyes before moving my laptop off of my bed, “There. Just shut up and go to sleep.”

Pete smirks, “I think I’m going to watch TV instead, actually. Porn sounds pretty good, what about you two?”

I clench my fists, “Go to fucking sleep or you can deal with Joe and his friend.”

Andy gently takes one of my hands and uncurls my fingers, lacing them with his own, “Calm down, okay?” he kisses my cheek, making me blush, “I’m going to go shower, but I’ll be right back.” he looks over to Pete, “TV is okay, but if you watch porn I’m going to let Patrick throw you out the window, and we’re four floors up.”

Pete rolls his eyes and grabs the remote, settling on South Park. I grab my laptop and play around with garageband until I feel the bed sink under Andy’s weight. I look up to him and take out my earphones, leaning up to peck his lips before closing the laptop and setting it beside the bed.

“Sleepy?” he smiles softly and gently strokes my cheek.

I nod and lean into his hand. He gently takes my glasses off and sets them on the bedside table before pulling the covers up over us and snuggling into me. I wrap my arms around him tight and kiss his forehead gently, aware of Pete’s staring.

“Goodnight.” Andy says softly.

“Night.” I snuggle closer and close my eyes.

Pete turns off the TV and lays down, facing the wall away from us.

Andy opens his eyes and smiles at me, before kissing my cheek and whispering, “Sweet dreams.”


	3. Fatal Timing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete becomes suspicious of Patrick and Andy's relationship.

Andy and I have been fake dating for about a month now, and it’s going pretty well. Pete and I are finally returning to our normal friendship, well normal for us. And tonight Andy and I get our own hotel room again, and it’ll be great just to hang out with him. Pretending to be in a relationship with someone gets exhausting.

 

I walk into the room after Andy, closing and locking the door behind us before dropping my laptop and bag of clothes on one of the beds and following them, burying my face in the pillow. Andy laughs softly and sits on the other bed, pulling out his change of clothes. Despite my desperate need for a shower, I told him he could shower first since I showered first last time. I hate it, but I’m trying to be fair. Given how sweaty and gross I am right now though, I probably shouldn’t be lying on the clean sheets. I sigh and reluctantly push myself up and sit on the foot of the bed, grabbing my laptop.

He smiles, “You’re so pathetic, go shower.”

I jump up instantly and grab my bag of clothes, “Thank you!” I hug him quickly before running into the bathroom and turning on the shower.

He gently knocks on the door, “Hey, I’m gonna go raid a vending machine, you want anything?”

I roll my eyes as I pull my shirt over my head and toss it onto the floor, “What could you possibly want from a vending machine, isn’t everything coated in chocolate?”

“No that’s just the stuff _you_ get from vending machines.”

I crack the door and peek out, “On that note, I’ll take anything covered in chocolate.”

He grins before I close the door to take off my pants, “I just hope I don’t run into Pete or Joe.”

“Why?” I pull my cellphone out of my jeans pocket.

“Because they’ll be wondering why I’m not like, in the shower with you.” he laughs.

I blush, and say, “Then hurry up.”, hoping that he takes his time.

I step into the shower and bite my lip, listening and waiting for him to leave. When I hear the door close I take in a deep breath and close my eyes, leaning my head back into the stream of hot water, wrapping my fingers around my base, feeling my face heat up with embarrassment as I begin to move my hand. The only problem with pretending to date someone and not arguing with Pete just to get off, is that I’m sexually frustrated. So all the kissing Andy and I do on the bus, all the making out that never goes anywhere has been driving me crazy. And when we’re not on the bus Andy’s always here and since we aren’t actually dating, my frustration has continued. So I’m going to take advantage of the short amount of time that I have alone, and help make it less unbearable. I try not to think of anyone in particular, but there was once Pete blew me in the shower and it’s hard not to think of right now. But I quickly try not to think of Pete, and end up with Andy. The tattoo covered drummer who is breathtaking when he’s shirtless, which is like all the time because he gets too hot on stage and the shirt comes off. My hand moves faster as I think about the fact that Andy’s going to shower after me. All of his tattoos and muscles visible. Not a bit of clothing hiding his body. Water dripping down from his chest to his-

“Patrick?” the bathroom door opens.

I squeak and cover myself before peeking out of the shower to see Pete, smirking, “Wh-What do you want, a-and how did you get in here?”

“Well Andy left the door unlocked so I decided to see what you’re up to.” his smirk widens, “And then I heard how heaving you were breathing, the quiet little whimpers. And then there was a moan…” he shakes his head, “Now what are you doing touching yourself when you have a perfectly capable boyfriend?”

“I-I just...w-we’re trying to take things sl-slow.”

“Uh huh… Well, I could always help you with that.” he licks his lips.

“I-I don’t w-want your help-”

“Oh really? I’ve never received a complaint from you before.”

“P-Pete, g-get out.” I tremble.

He steps closer to the shower, “Are you absolutely positive, because sure masturbating is fine, but when someone else touches you…”

I whimper, “P-Pete I’m ser-serious. G-Get out. I-I’m not ch-cheating on Andy.” Even though _technically_ we’re not really dating so it wouldn’t be cheating. I shut my eyes tight. No, don’t think like that.

“So you’re refusing sex when you aren’t getting any from Andy?”

I glare at him, “Yes. There’s more to a relationship than sex, although I don’t expect you to know that.”

He grins, “That’s it, get mad at me. Get pissed off so you can use that as an excuse later, a way to justify what we’ve done, what we’ll do.”

“I’m not playing your fucking game anymore, asshole.”

“Good.” he backs off, “Huh. See, I kinda thought this whole you and Andy thing was your way of stopping what happens, well happened, between us. And if it was, I thought, hey why not mess with the little guy while he’s showering. Because I thought, if you had a problem with it, you could have talked to me, you wouldn’t need to pretend you’re dating someone just to avoid it. But hey, you passed the test.”

I blink, “What?”

“I mean, I totally didn’t plan out the part where you’d be touching yourself.” He grins, “Happy circumstance. So you and Andy?”

I bite my lip and nod, “Y-Yeah.”

He nods, “Can’t say I expected it. I mean, a few years ago I would have sworn one day you and I’d…” he shrugs, “But it’s good, you two are happy, you’re adorable together and I’m, I think I should let you shower.”

“Yeah, I think you should.” Andy’s sharp voice joins the conversation.

I blush deeply, “Yeah, showering sounds pretty great, Get out.” I close the curtain and bite my lip before washing my hair and sighing, now that I can’t do much to fix the sexual frustration.

 

I shove my dirty clothes in the bag after getting dressed and brushing my teeth. I walk out of the bathroom and mumble, “Shower’s yours.” before plopping onto the bed.

“Yeah, I’ll get to that…” he hands me a few candy bars, “Here’s your candy, and what the fuck was that?”

“Thanks.” I open a snickers and take a bite before answering, “That was a mixed result of you not locking the door and Pete’s boundary issues.”

“I swore I locked it….but Patrick that seemed like a bit more than that. It’s not like the two of you were having a normal conversation.” he eats a few peanuts.

“Well no.” I answer after swallowing another bite, “That was… he walked in and uh, offered to join me in the shower. Then once I said that I’m not playing his game anymore, he backed off and said he was testing me…” I take another bite, “Andy he knew it was fake until I said that. Well that and I said I wouldn’t cheat on you…”

“I wouldn’t have been mad or anything… I mean, we aren’t really-”  
“I-I know we aren’t. But still I just… I didn’t want to fall back into that dysfunctional sex with Pete thing…”

“You’re avoiding the part I walked in on…” he looks up at me.

I bite my lip and avoid his eyes, “The part where he basically said he thought he and I’d end up together?”

“Yeah… I mean, if he still feels that way…”

I sigh, “If he still feels that way...then it’s too late.” I finish the candy bar, “Because… Because I don’t want that. Not anymore.”

“That’s a new change.” he raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah, it is… but, well aside from the shower thing, our friendship has been normal. It hasn’t been normal in forever, and before I took it for granted. I didn’t appreciate it because I wanted more. But more with Pete is dangerous.” I shrug, “This, it’s given me a chance to really see things. Pete and I in a relationship? We’d kill each other. Pete and I being fuck buddies was killing me. Platonic friendship...it’s better.”

“It gave you closure.” he says quietly.

I nod, “Yeah.”

“So, we could probably stop fake dating soon. Not like, immediately because I think that’d make him suspicious.”

“I guess we could.” I take off my glasses, “I’m gonna go to sleep… I think I left you some hot water.”

He smiles, and maybe it’s just my blurry vision, but it seems a little forced, “Right… I’ll go do that.” he grabs his clothes and looks back at me, “Good night.” before walking into the bathroom.

I sigh and get under the blanket, hugging the pillow. Despite how much I wanted to be alone while I was showering, I don’t want to be alone now. My bed feels too big, and cold. In a couple weeks I won’t get to hang out with Andy as much. I’ll end up rooming with Pete again and being dragged around by Pete. This is probably the last time I’ll have Andy all to myself, not a few feet away from Pete and Joe while we’re in one of our bunks, and I’m wasting it by going to sleep.

 

“Patrick.” Andy gently shakes my shoulder.

“Hmm?” I look up to his blurry face.

“Are you okay? You sounded like you were having a bad dream.” he frowns.

I don’t remember my dream, but I pull him into a hug anyways. He climbs into my bed and snuggles close, gently kissing my forehead as I fall asleep.

“It’s okay Patrick.” he holds me close.

 

Andy and I decided it would be best if we were a little distant for a few days, to make it seem like we were having relationship problems. It’s been two days since then, and I’m miserable. I don’t know why, other than the fact that I don’t get to hang out with Andy much. So I’m sitting at Starbucks with Pete, zoning out as he talks to me.

“Patrick.” he waves his hand in front of my face.

“Huh, what?” I look up to him.

He sighs, “You haven’t been listening to anything I’ve said. Hell, I asked you if you wanted to come to starbucks with me and you nodded, but once we got here you didn’t even remember walking here.”

“Oh…” I rub my eyes, “Sorry I guess I’m just tired-”

“Bullshit.” he sips his coffee, “What’s wrong.”

“Nothing I’m just-”

“Is this about you and Andy?” he asks.

I look down, “Kind of.”

“Are you two okay? Because you’re haven’t even been sappy or cuddled in the same bunk for the last two nights.” he frowns.

I bite my lip, “We’re just, I don’t think it’s really working.” I feel my heart sink.

“What do you mean?” he frowns, “It could just be a rough patch or something Patrick, it happens with every couple.”

“I-I don’t think it is. I-I think we’re going to b-break up Pete.” my voice cracks, surprising me just as much as my eyes watering.

He frowns and stands up, “C’mon, let’s go for a walk, okay?”

I nod and follow him out of the Starbucks, wiping my eyes and sniffling. Why am I crying? This was the plan, right? Fake a relationship and then break it off when the timing’s right.

He hugs me tightly, “Patrick maybe you should talk to him.”

“I-I can’t.” I sniffle.

“Why not?” he sighs, “He obviously cares about you, maybe talking would help.”

“T-Talking would ruin everything.” I pull away from the hug and wipe my eyes roughly.

“What do you mean?” he asks softly.

“Because he can’t find out that I’m in love with him!” I cover my mouth as my eyes widen. Oh shit.


	4. Honesty is the Best Policy...Except for When it's Not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete finds out that Andy and Patrick faked their relationship.

Pete raises an eyebrow, “That’s kind of expected when you’re in a relationship, ‘Trick.”

I bite my lip and pull at my hair, “You know what? It was fake. Completely fabricated because I couldn’t fucking stand the thought of sleeping with you again!”

He blinks, “Should I be offended?”

“No, fuck. You’re great in bed okay? Just, ugh! I didn’t want to be your fuck buddy anymore! I was sick of you completely fucking with my emotions just to get off! I wanted to be _with_ you! But no, you just wanted to fuck, provided we pissed each other off enough first.”

“So, basically I was completely right when I thought you and Andy were just trying to get me to back off?”

“Yes. You were right. Because neither of us ever talked about what kept happening and despite the fact that I spent months not fighting back, using every ounce of willpower to ignore you when you tried to pick a fight, you just kept on! Andy thought it’d make you back off, and so sure. What’s the fucking harm?”

“Well there’s that whole, my feelings thing, but whatever.” he mumbles.

“Fuck you, and fuck your feelings!” I shove him, “I was more than fucking obvious about how I felt about you and you did NOTHING! You never even hinted that you had a drop of feelings for me until the night you decided to invade my fucking shower, and by then it was too fucking late, Pete. Too late. Because you know what? I realized we would never fucking work. We can’t even talk about our problems as friends, how the fuck would that work in a relationship? We’d just bottle things up and fight and fuck and then fight some more! That’s not a relationship, that’s hell!”

He raises his arms, “Alright, alright. Calm the hell down. I know we wouldn’t work, okay? That’s why I never made a move. We’re fire and ice, ‘Trick. Now stop taking your problems with Andy out on me. So, you two fake a relationship, pretty convincing overall, and then you fell for him, right?” I bite my lip and nod, before he continues, “Then for once in your life, you stubborn shy little introvert, talk about your feelings. Tell him how you feel.”

“What? So what, just like walk up to him and just, what?” I snap at him, “What exactly am I supposed to say? Hey, Andy, so like, no big deal, but I’m kind of in love with you?”

He rolls his eyes, “Sometimes I swear you’re still seventeen. Seriously Patrick, he’s not going to run away because he thinks you have cooties.”

“No but…” I sigh, “Pete I can’t tell Andy, and you better keep your fucking mouth shut, okay? It was nice, kissing him and cuddling him when I had a chance but it’s done.” I bite my lip, “And I can’t put myself through any more of this so I’m just going to tell him I told you the truth, and we can all move on with our lives.” 

“Patrick, why are you so afraid to tell him? To tell _anyone_ how you feel?” Pete shakes his head, “The thing with us, how you’re pissed I didn’t say anything until a few nights ago? That goes two ways, ‘Trick. Hell, maybe we could have tried. Maybe despite all the reasons we think we wouldn’t have worked, maybe we would have. How long did you torture yourself hiding the way you felt about me? Can you do it again, but with Andy?”

I grab my coffee cup and stand up, “I survived hiding it from you since I was seventeen, I’ll manage.” I throw away the cup and storm back to the bus.

I open the door, nearly running into Joe, I walk around him, “Hey...where’s Andy?”

“In his bunk.” Joe raises an eyebrow, “Are you two okay? Because he’s being all…depressing which is just, really not Andy.”

“Yeah, we’re good.” I go over to the bunks and open Andy’s curtain.

“I thought you were at Starbucks with Pete..” he raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I was. And I told him everything, Andy.” I bite my lip.

He sits up quickly, “You what?”

“No, it’s fine. Now he knows, and we don’t have to pretend to break up, and it’s fine. He’s going to leave me alone, no more pissing each other off and stuff, it’s good.”

“What, What did he even say?” he asks.

“Well we talked about how he and I would never work out, that being why neither of us told the other about our feelings and yeah, so we’re good. Pete and I are good, you and I can go back to normal friendship and everything’s okay.” I shrug.

He bites his lip, “And you’d tell me, if something wasn’t okay, right? Because Patrick you seem a little...upset.”

“I’m fine, Andy.” I take in a breath, “I promise.”

 

I spend the next month, avoiding Andy as much as possible. When we run into each other, I’ll say hi, talk to him about whatever because I’m not just going to run in the opposite direction, tempting as it may be. Andy keeps asking Pete if I’m mad at him, and Pete, despite his wishes to tell Andy how I feel, just shrugs and tells him he should talk to me himself. And, he’s tried. But every time he asks if I’m mad at him, or if I’m okay, I tell him I’m fine. I tell him I’m not mad, I haven’t been avoiding him I’ve just been busy helping other bands. That part is true, I’m helping Cobra with something right now, or well I should be, but mainly I’m just peeking out of my bunk, watching Andy at the table solving crossword puzzles or playing Sudoku. Watching him as he bites his lip when he’s concentrating, almost laughing because almost every time he ends up giving up. I don’t want to avoid him, I just need distance. Maybe that’s where I went wrong with Pete. Maybe that’s why I couldn’t get over him. We were always together, it was non stop. So maybe space, and time away from Andy will help me.

“Stop avoiding him.” Pete hisses in my ear as we start to walk off stage.

“I’m not avoiding him!” I whisper back.

“Good, then you can room with him tonight.” Joe joins the conversation as Andy keeps walking towards the bus.

My eyes widen, “No.” I grab Joe’s arm, “No I can’t!”

Andy turns and raises an eyebrow, “Can’t what?”

I look down and shrug.

“He doesn’t want to let me borrow his laptop, probably because he’s got some embarrassing things he hasn’t cleared on his history, but Pete and I need it tonight.” Joe shrugs, “I’d use mine but I broke it.”

“You and Pete need his laptop?” Andy opens the door, “Why?”

“Because, Joe and I have been playing this poker game, on our phones, where you can have a partner and stuff.” Pete walks into the bus after Andy, “And well, Joe and I could set up to be partners on laptops, and totally cheat.”

I walk into the bus after Joe, quietly.

“Yeah, because we’d be sitting right next to each other and see each other’s cards.” Joe shrugs.

“So, you’d be sharing a room?” Andy asks.

“Well, yeah. That’s the best way to cheat at a online poker game, right?” Pete shrugs.

“Except, no. Joe can’t use my laptop.” I glare at the two of them, plotting against me and lying so easily.

“Dude, you can clear your internet history before we get there, geez.” Joe grins.

“It’s not about my internet history, I’m sure compared to yours, mine is squeaky clean. I’m not giving you the opportunity to completely fuck things up!” I glance over at Andy, “...on my laptop.”

“You can use mine.” Andy offers.

Pete and Joe grin wide.

“Thanks, Andy. At least you’re not selfish.” Joe crosses his arms and looks over to me.

I shove Pete out of the way and crawl into my bunk. I hate them both so much right now.

 

Andy let me shower first, but other than that we haven’t spoken since he got out of the shower. He keeps flipping through the channels on the Tv, and he’s already gone through every channel at least three times.

“Andy, nothing’s on.”

“I know, but seeing as we’re not talking I have nothing better to do.” he snaps.

“We’re not talking?” I raise an eyebrow.

He turns off the TV and slams the remote down on his bed before turning to face me, “You tell me, Patrick. The last actual conversation we’ve had was about a month ago.”

“We’ve talked.” I mumble.

“Yes, you’re right we have.” He stands up, clenching his fists, “Right, we’ve said hi a few times, there were a few ‘excuse me’s’ when we’d bump into each other, oh and I think when you made coffee one day you said ‘want some?’” he closes my laptop and shoves it in the case before setting it on the floor, “The last conversation we had, you said you were okay. You _promised_ you were fine! And then, nothing. Not a thank you for bailing you out of your stupid Pete problems, not a fuck you leave me alone, Nothing!” he shoves my shoulder, “And so Joe and Pete make up some crap about online poker, those idiots couldn’t play poker if their lives depended on it. I know they wanted to force you to room with me, and I know that they know what your fucking problem is. And it’s obviously some problem with me so stop acting like a child, and tell me what the hell I did! If you want to be mad at me, avoid me, Fine. Great. But I at least have the right to know why.”

I look up at him, my eyes widened, “You being angry is new…”

“You avoiding me for a fucking month is new too! What, are you sleeping with Pete again and you think I’ll judge? Because yeah, it’d be totally fucking stupid of you but I tried to help so why would you avoid me?”

“Okay, first, no I’m not sleeping with Pete. And if I were I wouldn’t avoid you because of it, hell you weren’t cruelly judgmental about it last time.”

“Then what!?” he snaps.

“I, you need to calm down okay? Breathe…” I bite my lip and try to think of an excuse, “I think I just needed some time alone, after the stuff with Pete, finally getting over him and all that I just-”

“If you really think you’re going to spoon feed me the same bullshit you’ve been trying to the last month, let me stop you here. I’m not buying it, okay? Time alone? You have no problem hanging out with Pete all the time so this is obviously not about that.”

I look down, “Right… if I tell you...that I can’t tell you, can you just accept that?”

“No, I can’t. I’ve been patient for a month, ignored for a month. I’m done. We’re supposed to be friends. I don’t even care if you’re mad at me now it’s been a month, get over it!” he yells.

“I’m trying to get over you!” I shout back before covering my mouth.

His shoulders relax, as he slowly sits on the bed, facing me, “You what?”

“I-I’ve been avoiding you because.. because the fake dating thing made me want it...for real.” I sigh, “I thought if I just spent a little time away from you it’d go away but it hasn’t yet. So if we could please just...forget about it okay? I didn’t want to make our friendship weird.” I look down and avoid his eyes, “And now that I’ve done that, I should probably just go make Joe switch me rooms.” I get up and grab my stuff before quickly bolting out of the room, banging on Pete and Joe’s door loudly.

Joe opens the door, and rolls his eyes, “No roommate trades, sorry.” he starts to shut the door before I quickly put my foot in the doorway.

“I told him. He knows and thanks to you two he’s never going to look at me the same way again. Just, please switch me rooms. I can’t cry myself to sleep when he’s right there.”

Joe grimaces, pointing behind me.

I turn and see Andy, before quickly pulling Joe out of the room, shoving him into the hallway and slamming the door in his face.

“Joe might need his stuff.” Pete raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah, well he can have it tomorrow.” I snap, throwing my things beside the bed, before crawling into it and pulling the blanket over my head, trembling as I try to fall asleep.

 

I wake up and groan sleepily before turning on my other side, hitting what feels like a person. I jerk away and turn on the lamp to find Andy, fast asleep in my bed. I look around to find Pete, but his and Joe’s things are gone. Andy’s bag, and laptop are both on the other bed.


	5. Always Pretending

I quickly scramble off the bed and shove my glasses on my face. Andy’s still there. I jerk my glasses off and rub my eyes hard, before putting them back on and looking at the bed, where Andy is still in a deep sleep. I bite my lip and sit on the other bed. I should let him sleep, ask him about it when he wakes up. I start to chew on my lip. Maybe I should go back to sleep so time goes by faster. I sigh at the thought. As if I’d be able to sleep right now. I should wake him up. I should definitely wake him up. I walk over and sit back on the bed with Andy, biting my lip as he stirs a little at the movement. He looks so content..and adorable when he’s asleep. I can’t wake him up. I stand back up and pace in front of the bed before groaning and getting back on the bed, shaking his shoulder.

He groans sleepily, “Morning.”

“What are you doing?” I shake his shoulders more.

He looks up at me, eyes heavy and barely open, “Sleeping?”

“No. No, in my bed. What the fuck are you doing in my bed!?”

He yawns and sits up, “Not the reaction I was expecting… what time is it?”

“It’s time for you to tell me what the fuck, exactly, are you doing in my bed? Where is Pete and why is their stuff gone? Are they still trying to swing the fucking force us to room together thing, only to rub salt in the wound like, blackmail you into being in my bed too?” I tug my hair.

He rolls his eyes and gently pulls my arms down, “You’ve got to stop assuming the worst. Like, maybe I’m, well I was sleeping in your bed because I wanted to be there. Maybe your feelings aren’t one sided. You didn’t really give me a chance to say anything, Patrick…: he frowns, “You just ran off… maybe I don’t want you to get over me.”

I bite my lip, “Andy… I can’t handle false hope and maybe’s right now.”

He gently pulls my hand into his and laces our fingers, “I’m not giving you false hope Patrick. And the maybe’s… erase them. Because I want this, I’ve wanted this for...for a while. So I was selfish, and while I was helping you with Pete I was letting myself get a taste of what I thought I’d never have. Patrick I… I thought you’d found out. I thought you finally picked up on why I still insisted on cuddling you when no one was around and that you’d decided the best way to deal with it was to avoid me. I never thought you were angry...just, that you felt awkward around me now. I’ve spent the last month…” he bites his lip, “Completely heartbroken.”

I frown, “I-I’m so sorry...Andy I had no idea that you...I was trying to save myself from being heartbroken I didn’t realize that it would hurt you…”

He smiles and bites his lip, “I’m sorry about shoving your shoulder and yelling at you.”

I shake my head, “I deserved it. Even if you didn’t feel anything for me...a friend shouldn’t ignore their friend for a month, just because they have issues.”

“So...it’s not because you don’t think we won’t work is it? Like you and Pete?” he looks down.

“No it’s not. I just didn’t think you’d feel the same way. You and I get along a lot better than Pete and I do, if you haven’t noticed, or did you miss the time I threw a lamp at him?”

He snorts, “No, I was there trying to referee.”

I smile, “And the biggest disagreement you and I have ever had was this month… and I think… I-I think we can move on from it. Overlook the fact that I’m occasionally an idiot...and, we could try. We could try, and if it doesn’t work then, okay. We can always go back to being friends but, I don’t think you and I can be friends right now. I think right now, we need to be more. Because if we don’t try we’ll be awkward around each other. We’ll build up some resentment and I don’t want that, for either of us.”

He smiles, “So we’re going to try?”

I nod, “I’d really like that.”

He smiles and glances at the clock, “We’re making potentially life altering decisions at four a.m.”

“Best time for it.” I bite my lip nervously before leaning in and kissing him softly.

 

When it’s time for us to get on the bus, we grab our stuff and kiss quickly before opening the door where, as we predicted, we nearly run right into Joe and Pete. We’ve decided to keep them in the dark, for about an hour for our own personal entertainment.

“Fuck, do you mind?” I shove Pete out of the way, “Oh, and thanks for ditching me, asshole.”

I storm off and quickly look back to see Andy shrug, barely hearing him mumble, “He wouldn’t even talk to me.”

I grin as I beat them to the bus, shoving my stuff in my bunk before climbing in. Pete’s the first one after me.

“Dude, what the fuck?” he opens the curtain to my bunk.

“I could ask you the same thing. Totally didn’t expect to wake up with Andy in the other bed.” I close the curtain angrily, well as angrily as you can close a curtain.

He opens it back up, “You wouldn’t even talk to him, maybe you’d be interested in what he’d say!”

“Oh, like what? It’s not like he’s just going to declare his undying love for me.” I roll my eyes, “Just leave me alone.”

Andy and Joe climb walk in as I shut the curtain again. I listen to them whisper in the kitchen area of the bus.

“So he really wouldn’t talk to you?” Joe asks.

“He woke up, saw me, and grabbed his iPod..what was I supposed to do, scream at him?” he shrugs.

“Kissed him? Thrown the iPod out the window?” Pete suggests.

I roll my eyes and laugh softly. No way am I going to last an hour of this. I crawl out of the bunk and shake my head at Andy, grinning.

“He did talk a little.” Andy shrugs.

“What’d he say? What’d _you_ say?” Pete is practically bouncing with excitement.

“Not much...well it was a long conversation...but...it kinda ended abruptly.”

Pete stops bouncing, “What? How did it end? What?”

“You really wanna know?” Andy asks.

“Yes!” Pete and Joe answer.

I quickly walk over, “Mostly like this.” I put my hand on the back of Andy’s neck and kiss him softly.

“Eww, really?” Joe groans.

“Awwww!” Pete squeals and pulls us into a hug, while we’re still kissing, “You guys suck! I was so worried you two would never be okay and-”

“We decided since we pretended to be together, we should pretend not to be for a few minutes at least.” I grin.

“Lying is a poor way to start off a relationship.” Pete says playfully.

“True, but when it’s at someone else’s expense…” Andy smiles, “It’s kind of fun. Now that everyone’s up to speed, we’re going to go make out in my bunk.” he pulls me by the hand to the bunks.

“Why you’re bunk? What’s wrong with mine?” I grin.

Andy glances over at them before whispering, “Yours is closer to them.”

I grin, “Oh.”

 

We crawl into his bunk and our lips meet instantly. By the time we pull away to catch our breath, I’m really looking forward to the next night we get a hotel room alone.


End file.
